Elizabeth M.
I have had an incredible life. I have gotten to do things that I think are unique & unusual in my work life, in my personal life, in my volunteer life, with my family. I've gotten to go places that I thought are really amazing. Do I wish I hadn't been diagnosed with Parkinson's? Yeah, being diagnosed with Parkinson's is in my mind ultimately death by a thousand cuts. It's a slow disintegration and you get to see it. You get to watch it. You get to note what changes, whether it's everyday, every month, every year. You watch progression that is really a digression. I could put a good face on it and say, "It helped me reevaluate how I was spending my time," but the reality is I liked how I was spending my time. I don't like having that capacity diminished, and it is diminished.
I just don't have enough bandwidth to manage my Parkinson's, my work, my family, my husband, my granddaughter, and an array of volunteer activities as well.
I've always had a strong belief that my value and my purpose is to leave this planet slightly better for my having been a part of it. Parkinson's diminishes my capacity to do that. At some point, when the balance shifts and you're taking more than you're giving, that's not who I am. I believe we are entitled to dignity during life and you're entitled to dignity as you pass and should have the right to do that. When it takes me longer to get ready for the day than to actually participate in the day, that's problematic for me. When too many things are out of kilter and out of balance, I want the right to step back and say, "I don't want to continue living life that is so out of balance." It is not bringing joy to me. It is not bringing joy to anybody else. That makes me too dependent on other people for just my daily activities of getting up and getting out of bed and eating.
I believe that we all have a purpose, and I do believe that it is really to the betterment of humanity in whatever small ways that may be. If I'm not doing that, then I'm not the person I want to be. I want to be able to make a statement. I'm not looking to hasten that, but I am looking to have the right to say, "Enough."
I just don't have enough bandwidth to manage my Parkinson's, my work, my family, my husband, my granddaughter, and an array of volunteer activities as well.
I've always had a strong belief that my value and my purpose is to leave this planet slightly better for my having been a part of it. Parkinson's diminishes my capacity to do that. At some point, when the balance shifts and you're taking more than you're giving, that's not who I am. I believe we are entitled to dignity during life and you're entitled to dignity as you pass and should have the right to do that. When it takes me longer to get ready for the day than to actually participate in the day, that's problematic for me. When too many things are out of kilter and out of balance, I want the right to step back and say, "I don't want to continue living life that is so out of balance." It is not bringing joy to me. It is not bringing joy to anybody else. That makes me too dependent on other people for just my daily activities of getting up and getting out of bed and eating.
I believe that we all have a purpose, and I do believe that it is really to the betterment of humanity in whatever small ways that may be. If I'm not doing that, then I'm not the person I want to be. I want to be able to make a statement. I'm not looking to hasten that, but I am looking to have the right to say, "Enough."